Mr and Mrs Gannet

Gannet wallpaper by Edwyn Collins.

It was late at night when Ethel woke to the sound. It was a very frightening noise. A shriek here and a squawk there. A mixed bag of chattering, fluttering and flapping. It didn't at all sound human. As Ethel rubbed her sleepy eyes she realised the commotion was coming from down the stairwell. Ethel suddenly wasn't scared at all. Aaah, it's the visitors she thought. It was cetainly the right time of year.
Many years earlier Ethel had meet her visitors on holiday. She remembers how beautiful they were, stunningly snow white plummage and an amazing ability to produce a perfect tiny chalky blue egg. They spoke of their love of Scotland, the North sea and their passion for diving and fishing. Ethel promised that if they ever visited her Victorian home she would keep a good stock of tinned fish in her store cupboard ready for them to enjoy.
Ethel made her way down the steep stairs and turned the corner and there they were all long bill smiles and empty tummies waiting to be filled with fish. Hello Mr Gannet, Mrs Gannet "How was your journey? So lovely to see you...pilchards, squid or anchovies for supper?"